5/30 - 5 Things That Make Me Happy

        Happiness.  Feeling pleasure, satisfaction, or joy.  A state of well-being and contentment.  How many people today can say that they are truly happy?  I don't mean the kind of happy that you feel on those days when you wake up and manage to not stub your toe while heading to Wawa to find out that they have your favorite pumpkin spice coffee when you arrive, your work day goes smooth and quick, & before you know if you're home and the kids already have their homework finished and your husband decides to take you out to dinner and give you the night off.  No, not that kind.  That's superficial happiness.  Temporary bliss.  Tomorrow your dog might pee on your new Coach purse, or you might break a nail before you even leave the house, and then it's all downhill from there.  I'm talking about unshakable happiness.  Joy, actually.  The kind of happiness that doesn't come and go, it stays with you, it is you.  Joy that fills your heart, and although the storms may come, you will not be shaken, you will not be stirred.  Yes, you're allowed to pout, you can even cry, but at the end of the day you know where your joy comes from and you don't let life get you down.

        So, for this challenge, I'm asked to list 5 things that make me happy "right now".  I'm assuming that it's referring to superficial things and not asking me to get super deep here, but whatever, I'm as deep as an ocean baby, so deal.

1. My husband - He makes me happy most of the time, except for those times when he doesn't. HA!  That's where love comes in!  Love is caring for each other even when you're angry.  We are genuinely happy with one another, so even when we have disagreements like every married couple does, we work through them and become stronger!
2. My kids - They make me happy most of the time too!  Right now my daughter is too young to make me mad, and she's just too darn squishy cute too!  My son is at that age where he's testing boundaries, and learning to talk back, although he's mostly respectful and usually corrects himself quickly!  I love spending time with them and watching them learn, play, and grow!
3. Being a stay at home mommy - I love being able to devote myself fully to my husband, children, and home. 
4. Cooking/Baking - One of my favorite past times... I get such a thrill making stuff in the kitchen, and the best part is the faces of family & friends when they taste and love my creations!
5. Blogging/Browsing Facebook/Pinterest/Internet in general - This is a given.  It's so relaxing and fun!

4/30 Things - Letter to my 16 year old self

        I am switching this up a bit from 10 things you would tell your 16 year old self if you could to just writing a letter to my 16 year old self.  Reason being, I don't know if I can genuinely come up with 10 things.  Heck, there might be more or there might be less, I won't know until I start.  I think that a letter format would be much easier and more heartfelt anyhow, so feel free to improvise too if you are following along with your very own blog challenge.  This is about having fun, we're not being graded for following directions =)

        Dear 16 year old me,
     You are probably so thrilled right now, you're finally starting to blossom.  Most of your school years, you have felt like an outcast, or if I may be so blunt, an ugly duckling.  You finally learned how to correctly apply eyeliner, and your bra actually fits now too!  You still aren't happy with your body, because thanks to the music videos, magazines, and TV you've been exposed to, you believe that there's only one version of the "perfect girl/woman" and you aren't it.  You see, your generation is the start of a big change.  Yeah, Madonna liberated lots of women some 18ish years ago, but her ideas are nothing compared to what's coming.  I hope you're ready.  Actually, I know you're not.  But there's good news, you won't ever fit that mold of the "perfect girl/woman" that the media portrays - and that's a GOOD thing!!!!  You'll learn (in about 10 years, give or take) that the woman the media and society expect you to be, is far from God's idea for you.  She's NOTHING like the Proverbs 31 woman.  She doesn't have class, or values, she cares more for her appearance than her character.  She seeks to attract men from her physical attributes and assets rather than  her heart and reverence for the Lord.  She thinks that showcasing her flat stomach and long legs are the secret to getting the hottest guy in town.  She believes her breasts are for men to oogle at, rather then to feed future children.  And no I am not saying that breasts cannot be enjoyed visually (BY YOUR FUTURE HUSBAND, not random men), but that is not their main purpose.  And last of all, she is a fictitious and unattainable character.  Chasing after her image will only lead to heartache, heartbreak, and wasting countless hours of your life trying to achieve something that won't ever serve you in the "real world".  Sure, you might get some stares, or some whistles, but that's nothing compared to what you'll feel when you meet the love of your life and marry him on a beautiful February day in 2011.  Most of all though, don't change anything about yourself after reading this letter, because the storm you're going to pass though is necessary to mold you into the person you're going to be.  You are going to think your heart is breaking sometimes, but it's really not.  You are going to lose some friends, but they weren't really friends to begin with.  You're going to make some mistakes, but you will learn from them and be a better person from it.  You're going to have to deal with some really tough stuff in the next few years, but things are working together for the best.  You're going to be strong and happy, and you're going to make a difference in the world!  Hang in there kid =)

3/30 Things - Parents

        Words cannot express how thankful I am to have been raised by my parents.  There are too many adults my age dealing with various issues because of their childhood upbringing.  Now, I'm not saying that my parents were perfect, because they were far from it, but they tried so hard to give me a wonderful childhood.  They had their fair share of "issues" when I was younger (mostly stuff I don't remember) but they stayed together, and worked things out.  Sadly, my father passed away in 2005, leaving my mom widowed and alone (I was living in an apartment at the time, with my ex and my son (who was around 3 at the time).

        Honestly, to this day I believe that everything happens for a reason.  While my parents brought me up to respect myself enough to wait for marriage, I strayed a bit in my teenage years, and wound up pregnant at 17.  Now, am I saying that God planned for me to be a 17 year old mother in an unhealthy relationship?  No, but I believe that things happened so that my dad could have a grandchild before he passed.  He got to spend 3 years with my son, and strangely enough (or miraculously?) at 10 years old, my son remembers his grandpop from his babyhood/toddler-hood and I believe that it has helped form him into the awesome kid he is today.

        Towards the end, I wasn't very close with my parents due to my depression.  I can honestly say that I don't even remember the last year or so of my father's life, and that's been difficult for me to write or talk about... I blocked a lot out from the first few years of my son's life, and that hurts too.  I think the depression was both from the fact that I was in an unhappy relationship and also that my father passed away so suddenly, and I never really had a chance to say goodbye.

        Over the years though, I have forgiven myself and realize that time can't be rewound.  I can only move forward and make the most of life now.  Family is precious and we should cherish and love them.  My mom now lives with my husband, children, and I.  Lots of people think that "living with in-laws" doesn't work out, but this setup is great for us.  My mom isn't lonely, she gets to spend lots of time with her grandchildren, and in turn we get the joy of her company as well.  She is a wonderful and selfless person who loves the Lord and has much wisdom about life to offer.

        I can't make a post about parents though without including my mother-in-law.  She has truly been like a second mother to me over the past 6 years.  Ever since I met her, she has been nothing but wonderful to my son and I.  She is a great Noña to him and is thrilled that she now has a beautiful granddaughter to enjoy also!  She raised my husband into the wonderful man that he is today, and continues to be a strong, inspirational role model in his life.

        In closing, I believe that we are given the parents (or parental-figures) that we have for a reason.  The impact they make on us, whether positive, negative, or whatever it may be, helps to shape us into who we are today and what kind of parents/spouses we will become.  This can teach us a valuable lesson too though, because as parents, our children are watching us and learning from us, we are shaping them for the future, just as our parents did with us!

Blog Challenge - The Rundown

        So I was looking for ideas to write about, to inspire me in the blogging world.  Trust me, I have plenty to say, but sometimes "blogger's block" gets me, and while I have 20 different ideas flowing through my head at 2AM while I lay in bed, or while I'm folding 3 loads of laundry (of which every single shirt and sock is inside-out, thanks darling husband <3 ), when I actually sit down to write, my thoughts evade me, and I sometimes draw a blank.  

        That lead me to my favorite information highway, aka Google, and I began searching for a blogging challenge.  I've seen them before, on some of the blogs that I follow non-loyally, so I knew about them - just never participated.  After a quick search, I came upon Brown Eyed Girl's Ramblings blog, and decided that this list looked quite fun!  If you like what you see, join in, link up, and accept the challenge!